


Where Were You When I Needed You?

by Phantom_Serenity



Category: Benedict Cumberbatch - Fandom, British Actor RPF
Genre: Adorable Fluff, F/M, Smut, TW: Mentions of abuse, and fluff, nothing major
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-09
Updated: 2013-12-09
Packaged: 2018-01-04 04:48:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,494
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1076718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phantom_Serenity/pseuds/Phantom_Serenity
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You hadn’t seen him in quite some time. It had been almost a year actually. A year since you had seen your old friend Benedict. When Ben texted you and asked about how things were with you and your boyfriend, and an offer of having coffee, you had blown him off curtly, telling him to not bother you. You didn’t want to, but the bruises left on your body reminded you of why.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Where Were You When I Needed You?

You hadn’t seen him in quite some time. It had been almost a year actually. A year since you had seen your old friend Benedict.

He had bumped into you and your boyfriend while you were out to dinner. Even though it had all been so pleasant at the restaurant, there had been hell to pay after. Later, when Ben texted you and asked about how things were with you and your boyfriend, and an offer of having coffee, you had blown him off curtly, telling him to not bother you. You didn’t want to, but the bruises left on your body reminded you of why. He had been so angry about Ben, wanting to know what had gone on between the two of you. Unfortunately, he didn’t believe the sad truth that nothing had gone on. You and Ben had become friends so long ago. Of course you had been attracted to him, but the role of his friend was suiting you nicely. You never let on how you felt. Then he was gone more and more, filming and such, and you had found yourself in a relationship with a guy. At first you were happy, and then it just filled your needs. And then, near the end, it simply was easier to stay, avoid the confrontation. 

Ben had respected your request to not bother you. So here it was, almost a year later, and he walked into the coffee shop about two minutes behind you. His voice rang out over the general noise, calling your name. Turning, you smiled. Now that the worst of your life was behind you, it was wonderful to see him. Immediately he offered to buy your drink, declaring that it had been far too long. As you sat down together, he made the comment that you looked fantastic, then blurted out “Much better than the last time I saw you!” Chuckling, you murmured “Yes, well, I’ve made a few changes.” At his curious glance and nod, urging you on, you mentioned that you weren’t dating the man he had seen you with last time. Putting on his Sherlock persona, he waved his hand and quoted “Forget about him, he’s an idiot.” It made you laugh, helping relax you. Being around Benedict again had resurrected all the old feelings, plus a different kind of ache, exacerbated by your own feelings of stupidity. Quickly you worked on getting Ben talking about some of his latest projects and trips, anything to distract him. And oh could he talk.

It really seemed that he had forgotten all about how mean you had been to him. How you had blown him off and never spoken to him since. That made it easy, but at the same time, it left you baffled. Then it just created a different kind of pain. Maybe you just didn’t even matter that much to him, so it was no big deal when you blew him off thanks to your abusive boyfriend. Watching him as he talked, you fought the rising pain, anger, and (what you hated to admit) love that was whirling around inside. Yes, you love him. Deep down you have for so long. Maybe that’s what the Great Disappointment sensed that night you two ran into him. 

As you both stood a few hours later, ending the heartbreakingly wonderful time together, he hugged you close, murmuring comments about needing to chat again soon, spend more time together. You nodded, staying noncommittal about it. Right now, you’re not too sure if you can handle being around him too much. If you do, the feelings that are already stirring will flame up into something that will just break your heart all over again. Kissing him on the cheek, you murmur “Take care of yourself, Benedict,” and start down the street. Hoping that you can get around the corner and away from him, away from everything you’re feeling right now. That’s what you do best, hide away.

As you walk on, suddenly you hear him calling your name again. You debate for a second on whether you should just pretend like you don’t hear him, but in the end your better side wins out. Stopping, you turn to see Benedict striding toward you, those long legs of his getting him to you in no time. Without any preamble, he pulls you close to him, whispering “What have I done wrong?” Pulling back, you start shaking your head, trying to deny, but he won’t let you. “Why are you shutting me out, darling?” Pushing him back, you growl “Benedict, don’t, please.” Before he can speak, you start to dash off. Your flat is only a few blocks away, and you hope to just get inside and lock yourself away.

What you didn’t count on was Benedict chasing after you the entire way. When he calls your name as you walk up your steps, you stop, defeated. You should have guessed he wouldn’t give up this easily. He’s a very stubborn man. He walks up the steps, towering over you, those glass colored eyes showing hurt and tenderness. “Why did you rush off? Talk to me, sweetheart.” Your shoulders sag, and you whisper “Come inside, alright?” He nods, and slowly walks inside with you. “This is… you haven’t lived here long, have you?” he asks. Shaking your head, you explain “I moved here after I… broke up with him.” Sitting down, you point to another chair and say “You might want to sit, this will take awhile.” Instead of sitting across from you, he moves next to you, reaching and holding your hand. It startles you, but you know Ben to understand he wants to give any comfort he can. You explain to him about your ex-boyfriend, and how he turned out to be an abusive alcoholic. You even tell him about how you got beat the night he had seen you two, and that’s why you had blown him off. His lips press together, but he says nothing till you finish.

“You should have told me,” he rumbles at last. “What was I going to tell you?” you shoot back. “That I got myself into a stupid mess?” He jumps up, starting to pace. “I would have done something to help you!” Covering your face, you moan “I had to help myself, Benedict.” Coming back to the sofa, he takes your hands again. “But he attacked you because of me. That shouldn’t have happened.” Trying to break free, you mumble “He attacked me because of anything. It didn’t matter; it was just another excuse for him.” Benedict will not let you get away that easily. “But darling, I could have… I should have…” You can’t stand Benedict saying this. Jumping up, you start pacing. “Benedict, you need to go.” His kindness is only making things harder. From his seat on the sofa he shouts “Why? Why do you want me to go?” 

“Because he was right!” you finally shout out, whirling around to face him. “I did have feelings for you!” Wrapping your arms around your stomach, as if to protect yourself from blows, “I’ve always cared about you, Benedict. For the longest time I’ve loved you.” You hear him standing, moving toward you. “Darling, I… I never knew…” he murmurs, trying to hold you. Twisting away, you shout “No, you didn’t! How did you not know? I’ve been head over heels in love with you, Benedict. Where were you when I needed you? When I wanted you? How could you not see?” 

Staring down at you, he whispers “Because I was so busy hoping you wouldn’t notice I’m in love with you.” Slowly, as if he’s afraid of spooking you, his wraps his arms around you. “I’ve wanted you for so long.” Your whole body seems to turn into flame as his words hit home. Leaning down, he whispers “I’ve cared about you, loved you so long. And to know that you were hurt by someone because of me… I can’t stand that, love. I’ll spend the rest of my days making it up to you, if you’ll allow me. Let me, darling, please. Let me love you as I’ve always wanted to.” His soft plea hits you hard. Time slows and you notice every detail of this moment, of his actions. How he’s holding you without trapping you, his fingers skimming down your back softly. His breath ghosting over your ear as he whispers, like every word is a secret for just you two. Your hand rest on his chest and you feel the pounding heart that promises so much, if you’ll only take the chance. 

Slowly you lift your eyes to meet his, and you can’t help smiling at how he’s looking at you. Hope, love, fear, desire, they all swirl in those beautiful eyes. Nodding slowly, you murmur a simple “Yes”. A smile brightens his face as he hears you. His arms tighten around you gently, pulling you closer. “May I… god may I please kiss you like I’ve wanted to?” he asks urgently. It’s obvious what he’s doing. He’s so polite and gentlemanly anyway, and combining this with what you’ve told him of your last relationship, you understand that he’s going to make sure you are perfectly okay and consenting to anything he wishes. Smiling up at him, you nod and urge “Please do, Benedict.” Saying his name must have broken the last chain of his control. His lips land on yours sweetly, but the hint of desire and urgency is still there. Your hands move upwards, cradling his head and keeping him right there to continue this moment. As the kiss deepens, you both moan softly, a heavenly sound blending together. With your bodies pressed together you feel his heart pounding faster, in perfect sync with yours. He pulls back just enough to whisper “Alright, sweetheart?” Nodding frantically, you try to continue the kiss but he stops you, asking “Could we sit? I don’t think my knees will hold me up any longer?” The boyish smile he gives you makes you laugh. You can understand his request; your entire body is trembling. With a nod, you start for the couch but then stop. Instead, you tug on his hand and lead him to your bedroom.

Benedict hesitates at the door, whispering “Darling, I wasn’t trying to… I don’t want you to think that you have to…” Stopping his words with a kiss, you whisper “I know, but I do want to.” Groaning he lifts you in his arms, never halting the kiss as he carries you to your bed. Once landed, you each work diligently, but slowly, to remove each other’s clothing, revealing each bit of skin like a fresh work of art. As you both are finally bare, he pulls you close. Instead of the sexual heat that’s been there, this move is simple comfort, real love. He lies back, still holding you, his hands caressing you tenderly. “My love,” he whispers, “My darling.” Leaving you on your back, he moves to hover over you, kissing you as his hands familiarize themselves with your body. Each touch causes a moan, a sigh to escape from you. You can see him making mental notes of just what pleases you. No surprise, you know him to be a very thorough man in everything he does. That he is this way in tender moments just adds to your love.

Finally, his fingers begin stroking your wet slit, causing you to lift your hips and moan loudly. His grin at your response is breathtaking. “God you are stunning,” he whispers. “Too long I’ve wanted to know what it’s like seeing you let go, watching you find pleasure.” Reaching to kiss you, he growls “Today I will make both our dreams come true.” This promise floors you, making you only able to nod helplessly. You reach into your bedside drawer, fumbling till you find the box of condoms that’s not been needed till today. Pulling one out, you hand it over, pleading “Now, Ben, please.” His eyes heat up, and he makes quick work of the foil wrapper, rolling it over himself easily. When he moves to station himself between your legs, he groans at how your legs spread further, inviting him in. Once more he glances up at you, silently seeking permission one last time. Your legs wrap around his hips, pulling him closer as you mumble “Yes, yes Benedict.”

As he presses into you, taking his time, each inch causes new groans to fly from both of you. Ecstasy is plain on his features, and he leans down to whisper “Alright, darling?” Nodding, you kiss him and arch up, wanting him sheathed in you fully. His hands grasp your hips as he finally plunges all the way inside. Neither one of you move at first, simply adjusting and enjoying this first union. Slowly he finally begins to rock against you, shallow thrusts that still cause your eyes to roll back as you moan. “Just perfect,” he rasps, the thrusts slowly deepening. One of his gorgeous hands moves up, cupping and kneading your breasts gently. The gasp that comes from you makes him grin that impossible smile, happy in the knowledge that he’s pleasing you. His movements continue, and you feel yourself beginning to spiral. “Yes, love,” he rumbles, “Let go. Cum for me.” You can only do as he orders, cumming around him and calling out his name. 

He wraps his arms around you and rolls your bodies so that you sit atop him. “That’s what I want to see,” he murmurs, his hands roaming over you. Starting to ride him, you take pleasure in coaxing the sounds of raw pleasure from him. Another climax is building, but you try to hold it back, not wanting to find release till Benedict is with you. His moans and gasps increase, and he starts bucking up into you. Finally he pants out a warning. “Darling, darling I’m close, so close.” Increasing your movements, you whimper and scream as you cum. His shouts blend with yours as he grips your waist, pounding into you as he throbs and then cums, your name a chant of thanksgiving on his lips.

Your body falls against his, and his arms immediately wrap around you, a tender gesture that moves you. “Are you… you alright love?” he pants out softly. With a smile, you kiss him sweetly. “Yes, more than alright,” you tease. “I think I’m feeling rather close to perfect.” He pulls away just enough to rid himself of the condom, but comes right back to holding you. As he wraps his arms around you, you reach for the blankets, pulling them over your bodies as you revel in his warmth. “I’m staying right here with you,” he whispers in your ear. You understand what he’s trying to tell you. You’re never going to be left wanting, in need, ever again.


End file.
